


codename: ASTER

by moroder



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, some OCs but they're only supportive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-18
Updated: 2015-12-18
Packaged: 2018-05-07 11:01:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5454251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moroder/pseuds/moroder
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"i still have no idea why they needed me. taking up space? making jokes? guessing the crossword puzzles?<br/>who knows."</p><p>Pieces of Sans' laboratory log brought together.<br/>Made up mostly of headcanons and theories. Contains spoilers for the game plot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	codename: ASTER

**Author's Note:**

> so heeey after reading approximately a ton of fics about gaster and skelebros i came up with my own one eheh

_Laboratory personal log, codename: ASTER_  
_Date: 03.01.20--_

how long does this crap take to activate?.. oh cool, here we go.

first day at work. honestly? its eerie. they're talkative, open-armed though no one talks about stuff they're doing. afraid? maybe. afraid of the supervisor? sounds better.

first day at work. fresh meat. that's what the watchmen said, greeting me. i could only make jokes about my bones. their laugh is tremendous.

first day at work. i've got a permanent residence. a small room just for myself. wow. didn't think it'd stretch out for so long. i still have no idea why they needed me. taking up space? making jokes? guessing crossword puzzles?

who knows.

 

_Date: 04.01.20--_

woke up early in the morning. couldn't fall asleep, spent time wandering around the labs. found some documents on the CORE security systems. terrible handwriting all over them. couldn't make anything out.

everyone's tense at breakfast. as if heavy rain's gonna pour. but it doesn't rain in hotland. even clouds are bare steam. later i found out - _he_ came down looking for me. i didn't wanna go, but it wasn't a choice to make.

today's my first visit to the CORE maintenance. elevator was offline so i had to wander. need to make a shortcut next time. it's hot, dark and stuffy. everything buzzes, howls, evaporates like it's not a building but an enormous beast. maybe that's true.

he chose the most suitable place for himself. just as I thought. at the very center of the CORE to make sure no one gets to him by accident. it's even darker than in the corridors. floor melts under your feet but he doesn't seem to mind. i found him in a huge room all hung with monitors and paper sheets. everything's scribbled with those weird distorted symbols he uses to write. to talk. to think. one day he'll become a symbol himself.

i haven't seen gaster for two months. last time he called the day before papyrus' birthday. he asked if the little one would be happy if he came down. i said nothing, neither did he. what a conversation. he hasn't changed much. the same tall crooked workaholic as he was. he didn't ask anything, only thanked me for support. not at all, i said.

not at all.

 

_Date: 06.01.20--_

called home in waterfall. undyne picked up. judging by sounds, they're cooking. hope kitchen repair won't cost much.

 

_**/DATA CORRUPTED - ATTEMPTED RECOVERING UP TO 09-088888888889888--//** _

 

_Date: 19.03.20--_

it's nine p.m. it's dark. crystal corridors dark. except we don't have any crystals, only obscurity around us and faint glimmer of friel. the only burning monster among us. we sit in a tight circle, friel centered. there's eleven of us.

we're scared to death.

gaster announced a test run this morning. didn't say what he was gonna run but demanded a technician squad. i followed. tried asking him to no avail. gaster never tells anyone. even his closest relatives, even me. a team of eight monsters left. they worked for one, two, three hours; they didn't return and he didn't return. twenty monsters remained at lunchtime. two left shortly after. four followed them to report to king.

lights went out at five p.m. everything went silent. everyone. everything stopped. it would seem a beast whose stomach i've visited was gone. three monsters turned out to be nyctophobic. nobody knows where they ran off to. there's eleven of us.

more than half of us are asleep. they're tired. of waiting, working, being terrified. i can't sleep so i'm recording this log. alphys talks about something over my shoulder. her voice won't be on tape. what a waste.

thirty minutes after power failure we've heard screams. high-pitched and shrill as if monsters were being torn alive. sent shivers down my bones. it went silent soon. nobody came back. neither those who left for asgore, nor the runaways. neither gaster's team. nor gaster himself. it wasn't his scream, or i would've figured out for sure.

twenty minutes past nine. friel isn't asleep. alphys isn't asleep. i ain't asleep. snoring fills the room. there's eleven of us.

...

it ain't on record but

alphys yelled. monsters woke up.

the CORE entrance is unlocked. no one touched the doors after the power failure.

a figure stands there silently. i'm too far from doors but i can see the way it's glowing. dimly, unevenly, as if covered in phosphor stains.

the figure moves. alphys watches, mouth open. _"doctor"_ , she whispers.

it collapses.

ten monsters jump on their feet. friel and alphys approach the figure. i'm right behind them. dictaphone makes funny noises. the figure is dressed in long black robe with thick layers of grey powder covering it. doctor gaster is unconscious.

 

_Date: 20.03.20--_

emergency light source activated. it seems power went out only in labs. monsters locked themselves in their rooms for the night and didn't open till morning. rational.

eight technicians never returned. those three afraid of dark never returned. four reporting monsters called in this morning. eleven monsters are gone. nine monsters came down to fix the security system. alphys stayed here. she agreed to help me.

i still haven't found gaster's room. he didn't press out a single word since yesterday. what do i do? together me and alphys moved him to the CORE, then took the robe off him, spread it on the working room floor and put him there. i'd never think he lost weight again. cant say he wasn't thin before but… if i didn't know for sure i'd think he fainted over hypoglycemia.

alphys vanished in a moment. i stayed with gaster, at least by his side. tried to watch him a bit. he spent half the day motionless, barely stirring. then later he got up. asked about papyrus and his school grades. i hope i guessed them right. by evening i was up at the labs. alphys was still there. soon gaster showed up with an envelope, asking me to pass it to papyrus in waterfall. alphys yelped something about being brothers. my eyesockets went dark for a moment.

gaster handed me the envelope again. this time i didn't say anything about papyrus and waterfall. i remember taking it. i remember leaving the labs. i don't remember getting home. papyrus was skull over heels with joy. he asked when wingdings is coming over. filched that letter at night. gaster still signs with his first name. cute.

 

_Date: 21.03.20--_

asked gaster about anomalies. about things happened in the CORE and why won't alphys ask about papyrus again. he explained he tries to gain control over timelines and to learn to fidget with some parts of it. he mentioned that only powerful SOULs can do that in theory without much danger. humans have got them. not monsters. gaster somehow is an exception.

he's weird after all. i know saying something like that isn't good, but gaster deserves that. **_/unrecovered part of the entry/_**

turned out he reset a pinch of time for alphys' family question. she noticed nothing, but i did. he said it's my magic that possibly leaves me out of it. scary.

he explained the CORE incident. first test was a failure so he went on to fix it with the engineering team. then they turned to dust. all eight of them right before him. at once. he''s crushed. never at any failure did he look like this. perhaps the anomaly that murdered engineers hit him as well. perhaps that's why he spent the whole day lying still.

i know so little about gaster even though i've been living my whole life with him.

 

_Date: 24.04.20--_

nine a.m. today's the day gaster visits the king. nobody likes reporting setbacks. he promised to take me with him assisting. i've never seen the king, neither has the king seen me. only by gaster's words. he must've made up a nice description.

...

half past eleven. everyone's back to lab, everything's buzzing. monsters have been told everything about the CORE yesterday. some are terrified, some are encouraged. alphys among second. she'll be working whatsoever and finish her business. also something about body recovery progress. i didn't really listen.

gaster's talking to friel. her sparks ignite and fall on his shoulders. he finally put on his labcoat. as if he wasn't in a lab all time long. also a nicer suit. black two-pieces always suited him well. he seems cheerful. time to move out.

...

four p.m. back to my workshop. a note from friel says i have to recalibrate the fuses at section three. don't wanna test anything. not today.

the king is a huge globe of hospitality. and gardening. we spent about an hour at him and drank approximately a gallon of tea. each of us. golden flowers all around. an obnoxious color. tea is also made of it. it tastes surprisingly good. seems i tickled the king's fancy. the exact image of gaster's words, he said. doubtfully.

some time or other gaster gave out the bad news to asgore. the kings face didn't change much. he only went out to put the kettle back on. he suggested to keep that in secret, not telling the families. yet. after the CORE is finished, it'll be easy to settle this as an accident. gaster agreed at everything. at least aloud. the king's got a charm on him. i wonder if he'd ever give that boss monster a negative answer.

it was decided to keep the old scientific staff. there are still some technicians, including me. maybe we'd handle the situation in our way. reinforcement is to be called from capital if necessary. gaster isn't happy with this. he didn't say a word once we left the castle.

monsters cheered around us. too much. asked about the king. about how he took up the casualties. they'll never stop believing in him. gaster once told me the queen left her throne because she opposed her husband's path. everybody stands for him in here. the king should assemble an entourage for himself.

...

_/record setting: multiple frequencies/_

"King Asgore is whom I'd like to see. Can you imagine? We're getting out so seldom. It's only Dr. Gaster who meets him on regular basis."

"go meet him. quite a problem."

"Sans, that _is_ a problem! I never reported anything to him and I'll doubtfully get a chance to."

"easy peasy. ask about a meeting. then as he asks you why, say something like ‘king asgore. i have a problem.' he'll become serious and offer tea to ya. and you respond in ‘it's a horrible problem. i couldn't sleep knowing i've never seen such an incredible monster as our king.'"

"W… what?! Sans, are you kidding? I'll become a huge reddish ball then!"

"he'll blush. you'll blush. all fair."

"Yeah, sure. Nice joking here."

\--

"You're telling the wrong thing, Sans."

"oh? what d'ya tell them, doc?"

"Asgore is keen on flowers more than everything. Flowers and gardens, talk about them. He won't listen to you complimenting him."

"got used?"

"No. He just knows it's not true."

"you do visit him quite a lot, dont'cha."

"Hmm."

 

_Date: 18.05.20--_

papyrus is ill. had to take a day off. took a doctor from hotland who turned out to be alphys' mom. she asked a lot about her daughter, only then switching to the problem. oh, parents. told us to stay home at least for a week for recovery.

he was so happy to see me staying. visiting him for about a day became my habit. how long has it been since our last holiday? he's all alone lately and he's only fifteen. or sixteen? i'm completely out of this timeline. papyrus matured a lot, especially his face. inside he's still a child. hoping gaster would come home at his own birthday at very least. i'd like to believe too.

it's too late. he's asleep and can't hear me talking how. i hope. gaster was upset. i know he loves us… i hope. but today the CORE became his main concern. not us. he got really mad after he found out i took a whole week off. told me to get lost quickly. okay then. papyrus is coughing really loud in his sleep. in anatomic sense we've got no lungs, but i've got a feeling he coughs them out piece by piece. he'll get better soon.

 

_Date: 19.05.20--_

we'll screw me. he's having a fever.

undyne came over, asking if she'd help with anything. she said her parents cured her with something effective in childhood. she even suggested making it herself. no way.

turned out papyrus had a magic outburst. day before yesterday in school. undyne told me everything. that a laser beam erased a window in their class. that their teacher tried to comfort him and ended up imprinted into the floor. blue, instantly. no one knew where paps darted off to after. undyne came for searching, only to find him behind a water pile. under a bench. undyne is already nineteen. i wonder why she's still at school. she carried papyrus home and called alphys who contacted me at once. that's pretty much it.

he was non compos mentis whole morning. didn't recognize anyone, and we had to forcefully stuff him with medicine. he's asleep now. seeing him like this just… _hurts_. if i were home back then, papyrus would come and tell me everything. not wander around waterfall and catch a cold. damn job. damn projects.

damn gaster.

okay i may have gone too far. he doesn't know what exactly happened to papyrus. perhaps he'd flip even more crap over it if alphys told him, not me. but alphys doesn't know. he said he'd drop a phone call about papyrus' condition. hard to believe. it's seven p.m.

...

he _called_. papyrus picked up. he was aloof the whole day before and now it's like he's got a second breath. poor child. the way he yelled and exclaimed in delight… woah. now gaster has to drop by. then paps passed the phone to me. _he_ apologized. can't say i felt it in his tone. that's probably why he didn't come to say that in my face.

he promised to come tomorrow. yeah, sure. leaving his metal monster alone just like that.

 

_Date: 20.05.20--_

okay time to simmer down. i was too mad at gaster who actually kept his promise. unbelievable. papyrus forgot his sickness in a moment. gaster would hardly expect such a warm greeting. being so obsessed with working… okay okay i'll shut up now//

there's a feeling of being in the past. papyrus stuck with him the whole day. we cooked together. better said we tried to cook. no one of us ever got to learn. then alphys' mother came down. originally she came to check on paps but at the end she labeled us as ‘the worthless housetrio'. true. nobody argued. she sent papyrus to bed instantly and joined us at kitchen.

we talked about magic after dinner. papyrus got downright inspired after gaster's stories. he must've thought magic was his burden before that. then gaster spoke about using it. even casted a single blaster. looked awesome. i'm able to do something similar but i abstained for there'd be no house left after. then he taught the boy a gravity game. gravity checkers to be precise. he gave up to him several times. papyrus was so excited even though still having so much to learn. gaster refused to play with me later on.

...

_/record setting: multiple frequencies, voice monopoly off/_

"it's been a long time. since the last family night, i mean."

"Mm-hm. I was drowned in labworking, I admit."

"think youre ever gonna get back home?"

"Sans."

"i'm serious. do you even know how old papyrus is?"

"But… he's in the eight grade, isn't he? Or already ninth? It's hard to tell by his face, actually..."

"exactly."

_[sound: distant waterfall echo]_

"then you're gonna forget he even exists. since he doesn't visit the lab."

_[sound: burdensome silence]_

"then- _[sound: clothes rustle]_ why would you hug me right now?"

"Sans. I'd never let myself forget you. You two are the only ones I've got left. Do I really behave that horrifying way?

"you don't even notice that."

"Please stop."

_[sound: stirring]_

"wingdings."

"Hmm?"

"quit it. tell the king you can't finish the CORE. there's a malfunction or something. we'll move somewhere far away. where no one knows us. snowdin. that's the coziest place in whole kingdom."

"...it's really not long to wait, Sans. I promise you, once the CORE is finished, we won't be living the same lives."

...

gaster left this night. set back to labs. he said everything will turn to dust without him. papyrus is sound asleep. even his cough wears off swiftly. i wish i could be healed the same way.

 

_Date: 14.06.20--_

alphys brought a box of junk down here. claimed it to be human history. there are some disks in the box with giant humanlike machines and human kids. with swords. laser swords. alphys seems out of the real history. then she ranted about these disks for about an hour. everyone's super excited. we were lucky gaster wasn't here. he'd tell everyone the real events. ocean of tears and one blushing alphys. no one needs that.

gaster called for technicians once again. this time not for testing. maybe that's why it was safe. i was sent to western wing, a quite deserted place. halfway through i remembered i had no task. phone went out. found a room with archive videotapes. no idea who brought them here and why. none of them have an image. a child calls out for someone. "chara," it says, "smile for the camera!" chara doesn't smile. wish i knew who they are.

morning alphys fogged my mind. it buzzes. it remembers stories gaster told me. those long monotonous ones. blurry ones. gaster isn't as simple and wistful as he is painted. monsters' prince, the king's son died of human hands. a human child lived with king and queen for a while. must've gone after princes death. or before. gaster usually told these as bedtime stories. he might've thought i won't remember them at all. everything's so blurry.

asgore and toriel. asgore dreemurr. gaster didn't talk much about him. though he mentioned that queen left him after she found out his intentions caused by his son's death. she left in disgust. in disbelief.

don't think about it. fall asleep.

 

_Date: 15.06.20--_

i hope it records whisper. if it doesn't, screw it. i'm talking anyway.

i'm still at the western wing. it's ten a.m. i fell asleep at seven p.m. yesterday. wow. but that's not it.

yesterday... i found the broken unit. i had all needed instruments with me and i fixed it pretty quick. but the rest of circuits around burnt out with it, like a domino. had to take them up as well. after i finished, the light went out. local malfunction. i must've blown some fuse. fine. finished working with a flashlight. then tried to find the exit. didn't. found some sort of a service room. fell asleep inside.

now? i'm still unaware of where i am. got lost even worse. there's a control room, looks like gaster's. must be identical. i'm sitting behind a chair.

a child stands in front of me.

human child. certainly. i pointed a flashlight at it. thought it to be a weird statue or a fellow engineer. it blinked and yelled. i yelled too. it's got nothing. i've got a couple of tricks. humans must be all delivered to asgore. i don't know if i... if i'll be able to bring a child to imminent death.

wait. it got closer. i have to record that.

...

_/record setting: multiple frequency/_

"Who's... who's there? Come out. I'm nine years old! I'm brave!"

"nggh."

"I can hear you! And see you... a bit. A tiniest bit!"

"i'm not there."

"Don't lie to... me... what's this? What's wrong with my hands?!"

"what's wrong with its hands?"

"Hands, my... hands... are melting..."

"melting? what the--"

"аааАААААUGH! No, no, stop that... help! Help, I'm about to melt!"

"..."

"MOM! I'LL ALWAYS, ALWAYS BE GOOD, JUST SAVE ME! TELL ME IT'S A DREAM, I DON'T..."

...

it died away. i don't wanna look at it. last seconds it was close to drowning. sounded like a drowned man chocking. good thing no one asks why would i know that. okay, fine... i'm not a coward. i'll take a look.

oh. oh no. it... disappeared? dissolved. there's something grey on the floor, it boils. it glows dimly with a yellow light. i won't touch that. not on my life.

i...

i don't get it. feels like... i ain't the only one in my ribcage.

 

 _Laboratory incident log, codename: admin  
_ _Date: 15.06.20--_

Sans left and did not return on 14.06.20--, at the evening. He had a tool kit, a pocket flashlight and a cellphone which is offline. Sans had been sent to western wing of the CORE by me, Dr Gaster.

Phone signal has been located and tracked down today at 10:27, calls are being hung. It moved through the western wing towards the labs exit; I set off with three assistants. We found Sans near the airlocks. I tried to negotiate, but he used a destructive type of magic. At least once I got to use the shield, although the magic outburst was far more powerful than I expected. The dash of it... certainly was of a human soul. Cold wind blew through; assistants have been taken off the ground - Sans' gravity magic worked against us. "I just wanna go home," he said. A cracked, pitiful voice, it sounded so childlike that I understood: I was right.

I had to incapacitate him with an attack. The assistants were set free. We returned to Alphys in the lab. She's going to have a talk.

 

 _Laboratory personal log, codename: ASTER  
_ _Date: 15.06.20-- (addendum)_

_/record settings: multiple frequencies, voice monopoly off/_

"Alphys."

_[sound: papers rustle, a single laugh]_

"Oh, umm... Good morning... afternoon... Dr. Gaster."

"Alphys, have you seen the incident log?"

"Inciden... _[sound: keyboard clatter]_ Doctor, actually, I've been in... hehe... in the bathroom. I didn't see..."

"Then read it now."

_[sound: lamp tinkle; thirty seconds later - crashing sound of broken glass]_

"Alphys, you dropped a glass."

"Y-yeah... sorry... what kind of talk is it gonna be? It's the end, h-huh?"

"No, Alphys. Please do sit down."

_[sound: wooden chair creaking]_

"The fact I took a human soul for storage doesn't mean this resource has to be wasted all around."

"I... only just..."

"You had to tell us at very least. Leave us a note."

"I had an urgent idea, Dr Gaster! It couldn't wait a second! And it was... well... About resurrecting physical bodies."

"Explain."

"Well, you see... human souls have got an overwhelming survivability, do they not? A lot better than monsters, as their souls evaporate in a second. I thought it would be possible to recreate a temporal body for a human soul... which would keep it stable... for a while... till an appropriate host appears."

"Who happened to be Sans."

"Yes! And that's great - no - that's horrible! I couldn't even think he would be in the western wing. And the body was a lot less stable then I thought... oh, poor Sans."

"You'll get a chance to excuse yourself later, as he wakes up. The idea is good overall but the practical part... As we finish building the CORE, we'll get to your theory."

"Dr Gaster, please... forgive me for the soul... I'm so ashamed. I wasn't thinking!"

"Apologize to Sans. All the souls are alright, that's it."

_[sound: door closing]_

 

_/record settings: preset frequency/_

that... was so gross.

i'm lying on a bed in biology block. my chest feels so heavy, as if my soul fell down. it's two a.m. no one's around.

an hour ago alphys noticed that i woke up. threw my dictaphone to me saying it's got everything i need. then left. or better said, escaped. I listened through them all. then the incident log. nasty. feels like i've turned on my people. the soul from a dust pile must've got inside me and cut me off the body control. with my magic... crap. I hope i didn't kill anyone. it would down me for good.

 

_Date: 19.06.20--_

something's wrong. left my room at morning, everyone's silent. i waved at them and said hello, no one noticed. turned on the coffee machine, waited for someone to come for breakfast. then noticed it was 12 a.m. oh well. twenty minutes later nothing happened. took a break.

no one noticed me leaving. bad day. left in silence, eyeing the floor. looked up and there was waterfall. didnt think i'd get home that fast. though i wasn't going home actually, only walked a couple of steps.

it's quiet here too. can't even hear shyren. maybe she quit her singing lessons. lights are on at undyne's house. her parents must be absent. its six p.m. on my clock. peered at the windows and saw papyrus inside. they seemed to watch something. they were laughing so sincerely... i knocked at the window. no one answered, no knocking heard. i'm still wearing my labcoat. i'm so tired. i want to sleep.

opened my eyes. snowdin. it's always so welcoming here. who brought me to this location? or did i take the trip myself, losing mind? no one's present here. a tree surrounded by gift boxes, colorful little houses, snowmen. there are usually local people talking and laughing... it's quiet. i'm lying on the doorsteps of a two-storied wooden house. i wanted to build something similar after moving here.

but what if... i've already moved?

checked my hands, no injection trails. i couldn't be drugged, that's for sure. magic? doubt it. i pulled the doorknob. it's closed. knocked at the door to no avail. my hands slipped through the handrail.

...

wait. i recall that.

in waterfall... there was something inappropriate. something that's never been there. i have to check it out.

...

i fainted. woke up between waterfall and snowdin. there's an empty sentry station. 'out to lunch', a pinned note says. that handwriting's familiar. its eleven p.m. i need to start searching.

gah, here... here it is. wrong, unsuspected, rule-breaking. a door. walls shouldn't have such door, at least in waterfall. i've been living here for a long time but... honestly, i'm so scared. i've never been here. time's screwed. i'm screwed. i'm entering.

...

should've better stopped before.

it's dark. and empty and cold. not like snowdin's cold, it's unconscious cold. cold emptiness... a void. somehow it seemed to me that the room itself is tiny. nearly a doghole. i wanted to leave but heard something.

_"sans?"_

muffled, crackled. i turned around. a tall pitch black sihlouette appeared out of nowhere. it approached me until it stopped. i made myself look up. it had a white - pale? - face smeared with black. paint or scars, i didn't know. a face with mouth half open and faint glimmers in it's eyes. a deep, almost disappearing light.

a face of wingdings gaster.

i almost yelped. but jerked visibly, he noticed that.

 _"you stepped into this timeline as well"_ , he said. a palm with a hole in its center reached out to me and pet my head.

 _"i think its gonna be over soon"_ , he continued. something about the anomaly being short. that we're gonna be home. i didn't believe it. i think it's a dream. nightmares occur, right? what have i done to receive a plot like this. gaster's face is indeed cracked. one crack went down from his left eye to very mouth. feels like it's my fault.

i couldn't stand that. i turned away and ran. slammed the door shut behind myself. it vanished as i let go of its doorknob. i sit backing the wall where the door was. i'm so tired.

so tired.

...

woke up in my bed. two a.m. went out and saw alphys. she asked where dr gaster is. no questions about the time i slept though. i didn't know anything about gaster. then it went up in my mind, the crap that... actually happened inside my head? anyway I had to find gaster asap. i went to the CORE, found him at his working place. asleep. had to wake him up. strange enough, he told me he had a good sleep once in what seems forever. looked like he was happy to wake up. wanted to ask him about the timeline but he only spoke _"i know, sans"_. spookish.

let's start working. the sooner we finish the CORE, the better.

 

_Date: 04.07.20--_

theory day. alphys was working on her body recovery project secretly, but today she couldn't keep herself and went straight to gaster. dunno what he answered but she returned full of potential. that's what she said. then i heard some opening music from the lab. so potential.

then i had to bring gaster lunch. actually he's been in his workplace for a week. presumably not sleeping. but the brought cookie boxes are being found empty once someone comes next day. that means its so-so. other assistants along with alphys and friel were merely placing the plate and knocking, then leaving. i waited for the door to open. i have a right to see him at very least. he's not amused. told me he's very busy and has got no time for outsiders. i left at once.

later he sent me a log. gaster spoke about a phenomenon he found out. that it crawls out to the matter of time like a black stain. he turns into a lyricist when he talks about time and space. and he'd been researching that phenomenon for whole week. i wonder if i'll be able to work like this one day.

honestly, i miss the past. when we still had time to gather and be together. like a family. when gaster could help papyrus with homework because he visited home more often than twice a year. me too. when you could go out and reach the echo flowers. make a wish. what would it be today?

a life completely free of all this. i want to live in that house in snowdin i've recently seen on sale. it looks a lot like the one... from that dream. ah, connections.

 

_Date: 11.07.20--_

gaster fell ill. morning log is pure gibberish. it's text instead of speech and is written with symbol font. when he talks this way, it's okay, but when he writes it... no one made out anything. everyone's scared to go visit him. no wonder, i'm scared too. spent this morning decoding the log. everything's about the dark stain theory. readings negative, so on. the darkness grows and splashes outside. "what do you two think?", he asked at the end. two who? we don't know. me and alphys? what shall we answer? we decided to go.

fairly speaking... a part of me hoped him to be dead. the log arrived more than six hours ago. what if that was a dying note? i no longer trust his sanity. he could've done anything. if he's alive, we have no idea what to do with him. his magic could've altered. everything could've altered. alphys knocks at the door.

…

_/record settings: multiple frequencies, voice monopoly off/_

"Doctor, are you there?"

_[silence]_

"Doctor, open up… please. We're so worried!"

_[sound: screeching, clang of metal]_

"Thanks Asgore, you're here! How did you- _[sound: unsteady steps, low humming]_

"why… Who wanted to see me?"

"gaster, it's us. you asked about our opinion on your message."

"san- It's you two? should've told before."

 _[sound: whisper]_ "S-sans? Is that reasonable? He's all… you see… irresponsible."

"it'll be as it'll be."

"No… no, I can't. I'm frightened, I… seriously, you've got a better grip on it than me, you'll manage better if something gets screwed up… I'm sorry, I'm… so sorry."

_[sound: retreating footsteps, clang of metal]_

_[interference, parted recovery process activated]_

_[ **WARNING** : the following part of transcription contains pieces of the few entries recorded on 11.07.20--  
_ _and placed according to automatically generated order. Synchronization at maximum]_

"win… gdings. stop. please, stop."

"Sans… oh, Sans-"

at first he approached his control panel. typed something in for a while, spent around fifteen minutes doing that. then he turned around. he's got a crack above his right eye. it's weird i didn't notice is before. a glimmer from the dream.

"Sans, please, promise me something. This. is. so. important."

why did he ask for that. why. why. why. why.

gaster is screwed. i've rarely seen him like this. last time was six monts ago when the eight technicians turned to dust. something pours from the eye crack. not blood. he covered his face with hands.

"yeah, sure… what is it?"

"If I die very soon… before I get to see Papyrus. please promise you'll erase me from his life. he's too young yet. Direct him, give him a dream. children forget tragedies easier if there's something to distract them. it'll help you greatly."

why. why would he ask for this. why did he need it. why did it happen so suddenly. it was just a bit left. the CORE is almost finished. nothing bad happens.

no thi ng.

i hate seeing someone so wrecked.

i hate making promises. i hate it so much.

"h-hey… what's up? it's all good. we're almost done with the project. alphys has got ideas, friel was gonna run a research. e v e r y t h i n g  i s  f i n e."

_[sound: boot dragging, silent dripping]_

he was melting. i've seen similar things before. physical part of a monster melted because its SOUL was falling apart. also that child made by alphys.

he melted into something black. all across my labcoat and clothes underneath. my hands. his face was turning dark. i didn't understand if that was melting or… or tears. i know so little about gaster.

i wanted to escape. with my abilities… it wouldn't be hard. but i stood still. tangled with the void and not moving. as if frozen into a crystal.

dark darker yet darker is this ever gonna end-///

_[further recovery unavailable]_

**_[compilation end]_ **

 

_Date: 09-08-20--_

the last entry says two weeks ago. i already forgot about this little log. recorded everything into the research logs.

day after tomorrow. everyone's excited. more than two years of work and everything started with a single idea asgore suggested to gaster. they did so well. there's nine scientists including me and alphys. we're so tired and happy it's gonna end. even gaster looks alright and back to his working schedule.

we've even bought that house in snowdin. it's got two rooms instead of three but it's okay. i can take up a couch in a dining room. not a problem at all. the point is we're gonna live in peace.

...

it's seven p.m. friel and alphys left an hour ago for the final tests. gaster was called off by asgore so i'm all alone here. friel invited me to a festive dinner.. after they return she wanted to gather our small crew in some bar and celebrate the project end. she was so happy talking about it. friel is wonderful. she's whole five years younger than me. can't say that by looking at her biological research.

huh? sounds like a phone call. i'll go get it.

...

_[sound: heavy breathing, boots clattering against the metal floor]_

…

i've… i've only just left the CORE.

it's so screwed. one more accident. everything's sinking. found alphys unconscious on the floor. friel was nowhere to be seen. some dust lies still at the floor. it's latticed so some part of the ashes must've slipped through and fell into magma under lattice. god damn it.

brought alphys to sickbay. lab is empty. put her on a bed and tried to wake her. no response. gaster returned at approximately the same time. i told him everything… if i wasn't there, i wouldn't believe that. his eyes glowed.

it sent shivers down my spine. my left eyes glowed when i was enraged or desperate. his eyes glowed for no reason in particular. seemed like something clicked in his genius head. he hates it when i call him a genius. he says they die fast. geniuses and poets.

he went back into the CORE. to his working place. said something about a super important fact to double-check.

no one's gonna live in peace.

 

_Date: 10.08.20--_

alphys' mom returned to the lab. i called her. gaster wasn't happy but kept it back in front of her. she's a brilliant medic but even for her it was hard to determine what exactly happened to her daughter. she tried explaining it to me but quit after a while. i couldn't understand anything. i was so ashamed.

friel didn't come back. sure, it was her dust that fell into the core magma yesterday. scattered across the latticed floor. no one knows about it, only gaster and i. keeping a secret between two is dreadful. but gaster doesn't know what exactly caused the malfunction and why were alphys and friel hurt. i've got no idea what he's up to now.

oh, he's leaving the CORE.

...

he will visit the king again. that's my chance to sneak into his room.

...

it's open. phew. my hands are trembling. but gaster keeps nothing hidden in his working room. perhaps he trusts us so much… including me. what a douchebag i am.

it's… too hot in here. maybe gaster feels the environment in a different way. he's always dressed in those pullovers and dark solid clothing. i'm melting merely wearing a shirt. so hot and dark. at least the screens are perfectly seen.

let's take a look, shall we…

_[sound: continuous silence]_

…this… this can't happen.

doesn't he get it? **doesn't** **he?!** it'll destroy… no. no, _no, it's impossible._ ** _impossible!!_**

...

i failed to notice him coming back. i was yelling at my dictaphone and he stood still and watched me quietly. ghast. i asked him if he thought about the consequences, i spat out words and sentences at once… that in case of this experiment only the CORE is gonna stand tall and everything around will turn to dust. grey dust just like friel. the core was being built _for monsters_ and not for gaster's theories and tests. even though he built it. i was shaking feverish. my teeth clattered. my thumbs went numb from clenching.

gaster was totally okay with that. he just wasn't listening to me. moved me away from his working place and sat down. then explained it to me in simple words that he's gonna do everything as he wants and knows it to be. he didn't even try to listen.

but… if everything in his records is correct. i'm far from being a genius but even i understand. it's dangerous, so dangerous and it needs a great luck to work out.

i have to stop him.

 

_Date: 11.08.20--_

didn't sleep last night. there's a hive of thought in my mind. made a simple yet hard conclusion at the morning.

i have to kill gaster.

he won't stop unless someone gets into his way. or something. it he won't listen to me - and i doubt he'll listen to anyone else, - then there's only death to stop him. handed by me. no one else could compete him and no one would.

no. no, wait, is there another way? talk more. come see papyrus at waterfall, he's a family and a grown-up person. though naive at some point. give papyrus a dream. distract him from gaster's death. that's his dying wish. dying wish… oh, what a nasty expression. though considering latest conditions it would turn into a will with a light hand. my thoughts kept chasing each other all night. from a peaceful resolution to battling. i was sweating but at the same time shivers bit my bare skin. ha ha. its a metaphor, i have no skin.

alphys didnt wake up. her mother left for an urgent call but ordered me to watch her daughter and check her condition hourly.

i wonder how long will it take me to battle him? he's at least ten years older. or even more. once again i know him so bad. one thing there is for sure - types of magic he showed us. shielding, a thin white layer of energy absorbing magic attacks. a gravity attack - same that i and papyrus have. it's genetic, he said. there's also a blaster that only appeared briefly. i won't even dare to identify its power.

i have to go. it's three p.m. just checked on alphys, no progress. i won't last long but i ain't gonna sit here and watch myself die.

i'll leave the dictaphone here. i'm unlikely gonna need it anymore. i'll also erase the entries before this one. no one needs to know.

 

_Date: 11.08.20-- (addendum)_

 

i...

 

am proud of myself?

 

 

i found my dictaphone. i'm recording an addendum on eleventh of august.

i'm alive.

i killed my elder brother.

 

it happened so… weird. unclear. awkward.

he waited. waited for me to attack and tear him apart. i used the strongest attack i had, the four blasters. my left eye went foggy with cyan. then it was his turn.

i died instantly.

 

and so did i wake up. standing in front of gaster as he stood in front of me. with a calm smile. a crack on the right of his head. a white cloud of thick smoke out of his eyes. i remember him being so angry with something that his right eye burned with a white flame. it looked a lot like flames. this time… he wasn't angry at all. he was tranquil. couldn't wait for something. that's far from my rage.

 

he reset a piece of time that contained my death. i remembered that.

i attacked again with same force. same rage that before.

don't know why but he was only defending himself that time. i could see flashing chunks of white magic appearing where i shot. i couldn't even reach his sleeve.

 

at first.

 

he tried talking to me. but i… i didn't hear a ny thi ng. it was his fault. he'd got it that far. he didn't listen to me when i wanted to keep it peaceful. my eyes went dark and i attacked, and attacked, and… and attacked…

until a gap appeared.

a clearly visible black gap in his white-colored protection. i fired at once. he didn't even make a sound.

i've seen monsters dying. i've seen them falling apart. each time i wanted to look away, at least to be polite. but this time it… sort of attracted me. i could only stare. i watched him dissolve and… smiling. he died smiling. oh.

i saw his SOUL. a strange shape. looks like an upside-down human SOUL, but a dimly glowing light-gray one. it existed for a couple of seconds and shattered to pieces. i watched the floor. his dust fell down and a significant part of it had got inside the core. the broken SOUL followed.

i only woke up after returning to labs. caught my breath. feels like some black slime trapped me from inside. it makes me proud.

that's what he talked about. darker yet darker… a tremendous amount of darkness. i didn't want to cope with my black part and it stumbled and went silent. and i became consumed by horror instead.

did i… really do that?

i killed wingdings gaster. the royal scientist. my brother.

a piece of monster flesh. i didn't even feel like one. and i don't now. more like an… accumulation of a rotten and, and presumptuous

being.

i have to get out of here. alphys… oh hell, alphys.

 

_Date: 11.08.20--_

i've seen this date so many times it's gonna dig into my memory forever.

alphys woke up. she's in a strange condition. i called her mother and recorded a log for alphys herself. explained that a test ended up disastrous. that doctor gaster died. that i'm retiring because i need a rehab. that if she needs me i can always be found in any case. mentioned the CORE. it's complete after all. if it's run in a normal way and not gaster's program, everything will go smoothly. everyone shall survive. wished her luck. she's a genius too after all. a wonderful technician. she'll do just great.

without me.

i'm packing now. i'll only take the blueprints, gaster's lab machine and my dictaphone. the machine… i could try to repair it at some point. its function must remain undercover. about the records - i want no one to find them. especially if they get restored someday.

as i get out of here, i take papyrus by the scruff and set off to snowdin. our house can always be sold like the one we bought. we'll move the belongings. that ain't a problem. the problem is how am i supposed to explain that to papyrus. the moving. that gaster won't get home for holidays anymore. he's almost an adult at the end. i need to think what he'd like to do the most. make the dying wish come true.

this is the last entry.

code ASTER: disconnect from the log server.

 

_**[DISCONNECT SUCCESSFUL]** _

**Author's Note:**

> (about the waterfall part  
> after i finished writing this, i visited waterfall location, then called papyrus and he told me he knows little about it. it was too late to fix this so let it be a bit AUish)


End file.
